At the beginning of the year the main focus of my work was based around fertility and conception, in which I was using hair, maps and stitch as a reference to the context of my work. My use of maps was becoming overly decorative and although I have no problem with art beingaesthetically pleasing, it's when there's no sustenance to back it up that concerns me.
At this stage I was using the space outside the studio as an on going creative process and was grappling with my work, by the end of the week I had become disorientated by the process, feeling uncertain of what I was trying to achieve.
It lead me to broaden my contextual interests and begin looking at our journey from cradle to grave and not solely focusing on conception, but conception to death.
The subject of Memento Mori has always been of interest to me - hence why I connect with artists such as; Kathy Prendergast, Caroline Broadhead and Mary Kelly and more recently; Robert Gober who deals with memory in his work.
I began looking at old photos of myself and as a result documenting my own childhood memories. One of the books I was reading at the time was, Picturing Childhood: The Myth of the Child in Popular Imagery.
The author Patricia Holland says
'Family pictures are part of the ritual of family life and contribute to a sense of continuity and personal identity. They are collected and preserved to revive warm memories about a past that is part reality, part fantasy. They are, above all, desired pictures, which someone has chosen to make and preserve, and in which the subjects present themselves as they want to be seen'
I started to record my own childhood memories in blog I had created - which is also where I've been writing about my PPD project 'Borrowed Space', in which we have the use of an old dilapidated house which will inform and dictate the work that we create and have a gallery show in June. The 2 started to merge, my major subject and my external project, as I began to think about the memories of that old house and how they are seeped into the walls. I've been using wallpaper taken form the house to create work based around memories and have become fascinated with the everyday items which are often overlooked but also have memories - like the light switches. How many people switched it on and off, for what reason and who's fingerprints are stillembedded in it? Having participated in that space now my memory is embodied in it.
One of my own memories was of passing an old derelict house with my parents. The facade of the house had been demolished and you could see into the house like a dolls house. There was old fading wallpaper on the walls and an indentationof where the fireplace had been - the memory of it still intact. I remember my Dad's comment being, 'If only the walls could speak'
Working with this old discarded wallpaper, in essence I'm trying to capture the memories before they fade, crumble and disappear. I'm ensuring they are remembered by a new audience and their memories are distilled.
